(no subject)

[aadler]

– – – – – –

My entries have been getting longer, so I’m putting more of it under cuts, to allow picking and choosing by anyone who may actually read this.

First Cut — General news

I’ve spent the last several days at the home of my ex-wife Susan, trying to help her get her place into shape. I think she must have been in some kind of long-term depression (she’s acknowledged something of the kind), because the housekeeping situation had deteriorated past the point where she had any idea how to handle it.

I just showed up with a box of garbage bags, and used those as organizers. Too many clothes lying around to know what to do with them? Load them into the bags, stack them out of the way, and deal with them later; now, at least, there’s a little room in which to work. A separate set of bags (different color, to avoid confusion) for actual trash. It’s going to take time, but we have the hall, the hall bathroom, the living room, and sections of the kitchen reduced to levels where they can perhaps be eventually made manageable.

I also brought her a resistance exercise kit, in the hope that some fitness and toning will reduce a few of the things that ail her. As far as I’m concerned, anything that improves any aspect of her life is a desirable development.

Close First Cut

Second Cut — Regarding my daughter

The drama ministry to which my daughter belongs: over the weekend, I got to see three of its members perform at a local church. Though I’ve heard many descriptions, this was my first exposure to an actual performance. One of the three stayed the night at Susan’s, in my daughter’s room; since that’s where I’d been sleeping, I moved into my son’s room, and he took the couch.

Except, our daughter called about 4:00 in the morning, and Susan couldn’t get back to sleep after that, so she sent our son to her room and she stayed up watching television. All three of us talked to my daughter, which is probably the first time that’s ever happened since she left, usually she calls me in the northwest part of the state OR her mother and brother in the central part. Just worked out that way this time. She was calling from Taiwan, and clearly having the time of her life. Nine months in the Far East … that’s comparable to my Iraq deployment, except I got to carry big guns. I’m proud of her.

Close Second Cut

Third Cut — Other personal stuff

Susan went to the first of the Catholic inquirer’s classes yesterday, and was sufficiently impressed that she called back and got permission (with his agreement) to take our son with her for the future classes. Now she worries that she’s reading too much into it, looking to the Church — as to me — for answers out of proportion to what might actually be there. Whatever else it may mean, she’s doing her best to remain objective. This is good for us both.

I’m supposed to visit the Russian lady on Thursday. I’ll let her know about the coming DLI assignment, including the fact that I’ll be gone for a year and a half, and I may see her a couple of times more between now and departure. I don’t expect more than that to come from it. I hope she’s okay with it. Like most men, I don’t want to hurt anyone when a relationship stops progressing, but also don’t want to deal with unnecessary awkwardness. Under normal circumstances (what pertained before I got the word about DLI), I would have had to steady myself and tell it as it was. Now, since we haven’t actually gotten deeply involved yet, I can just let things fade into the background. I can live with that.

Close Third Cut

As I’ve been saying for weeks now, I need to focus on fanfic, the reworking of sroni’s stories. I’m going back home tomorrow afternoon; let’s see if I can make that the beginning of a commitment to writing.

Comments

[texanfan.livejournal.com]

The state of the house as you describe it can be a serious sign of depression. Is she seeking help of some kind? Clinical depression can be so completely debilitating. A good friend of mine has struggled with it for years. The doctors have finally found a medication that works for her and she's so much better. It's wonderful to see her enjoy her life after barely functioning for so long.

Getting to hear your daughter as a family must have been great! I'm so glad to hear she's enjoying it!